We had the pleasure of interviewing Kelli Benis. We discussed how pain is just an obstacle and that by listening to your body you can reach a life free from pain.
Read the full interview below and learn how Kelli took her first step to a healthier life.
How do you define pain?
Kelli: Pain to me is when my brain and intuition are not inline. I call my intuition my soul spot, and when I am not listening to it I get anxiety and pain everywhere. When you are not listening to your body, it becomes painful and everything goes wrong. I can’t just use my brain to think, if I did I wouldn't be able to heal. Instead, if I connect my brain to my emotions then everything is in harmony.
When did you first experience pain?
Kelli: My soul spot feels like the size of a grapefruit and it becomes tight and dense when something is not right. If my brain and soul spot are out of sync than even the small tasks seem hard and I spiral into a desperate pit. It is when I am in this pit that I think emotionally rather than feeling emotional. It is where I walk into a room and think:
“No one likes me”
“They are all gossiping about me”
“They will all laugh at me”
This mindset is dangerous -when the pain affects you socially and mentally.
The first experience I had with my soul spot was when my grandfather first inappropriately touched me. It was then that my soul spot begged me to tell mom and dad. But my brain kicked in and said that dad was going to get mad, mom would be sad, my brother was going tell everyone, and grandpa was going to get in trouble. This triggered a conflict between my brain and soul spot, where they were now at odds with one another. I felt ill and anxious. It was the worst feeling the world because my soul spot was trying to get through to me and I was ignoring what it was trying to say. My soul spot was telling me that I needed to act and tell someone what was happening to me! But I made the cognitive decision not to, and this caused my soul spot/intuition to shut down. It was too painful for my soul spot and brain to co-exist while they were on different sides. The only way they could work together is if I released my secret.
It wasn’t until I was talking to a friend that I first released the root cause of my pain. A friend of mine was going through a lot of pain herself, which was the outcome from her childhood trauma. When we shared our stores and our similar symptoms it was an OMG moment. I realized what happened - my intuitive self and my cognitive self had only begun to work together AFTER I had openly shared my secret.
I started to heal once I told my family and my soul spot and brain came closer together. But it wasn’t until I participated in the Victor Walk 20 years later that I had my ‘Ah-Ha’ moment. I realized that if I am on track listening to my intuition and doing what is right than I will experience no pain. Listening to my intuition gives me protection. I am now confident when I walk into a room full of people. I no longer let my brain run off of my emotions, instead I pay attention to what my intuition is telling me and act accordingly.
From listening to my soul spot I realized what my body needed and that was talking and sharing with others. Sharing my story was an important step to my recovery. What was life changing was staying mindful to what my intuition was telling me.
Now I am a confident version of myself and I am helping other victims find their confidence and motivation. Listening to our bodies is the first step towards our healing journey.
“There is no greater burden, than bearing an untold story inside of you” Maya Angelo